Thursday, March 6, 2008


We have a bug book, aka, Pest Management Book, at work to report bug sightings. They actually want samples so we're supposed to put the suspect on a piece of tape and attach it to the record page.

I spotted some ants in the room the art teacher and I share, so I discreetly mentioned it to her, thinking I could clean up the ants and collect a sample without distracting her 5th grade class. Boy was I wrong:

"What? Where?!"

I lift up the edge of the carpet, and there's a bizillion ants under there. An unidentified snack from the girl scout meetings appears to be the cause.

"BLAAAAHHHHH!" She starts stomping on them at fast as she can. It sort of reminded me of the Mexican hat dance.

"No, don't step on them! I need to collect them."

Now the kids are looking. She's still stomping.

"Where's the mailing tape?" No response. I wanted the big pieces so I could collect and clean them up faster. "Where's the mailing tape?"

No answer. Now the kids and the art teacher are stamping. Some are crawling on the floor trying to catch ants on their art papers.

"WHERE'S THE MAILING TAPE?!! It's complete chaos and I'm getting ignored, so I go in her desk and find it myself. I rip off a big piece and lay it right on top of what remained of the ants. It was difficult to stick them because they were scattered all over the area now.

"Oh kids, "says art teacher, "Go sit down. Mrs. Lydee is really gross with her bugs."

I ripped off a few more pieces and stuck them to the remaining ants. "I need to collect this for the bug book."

I used a paper towel and cleaned up the area then marched off to the office with my sample. A few of the ants are still wiggling, so I fold the tape over and press down.

A while later I return to the room. One or two kids are still crawling on the floor collecting ants. They've named them and are discussing their behavior. The kids want to know why I love bugs so much. "No", I say, "We have to record them in the Bug Book in the Office. That's the rule."

Apparently the art teacher didn't know about the Pest Management Book. She thought I was collecting the ants to place in a personal bug book!


sophanne March 6, 2008 at 9:03 PM  

NO WAY. You have to collect them???? That's freaking insane. Sure glad we don't have that policy- I'd be collecting mice from the wool in the piano where they were living. blsilihsekn;eka;ifh

Heidi Ho March 7, 2008 at 3:41 AM  

The things we have to do for the sake of education!!! They sure don't pay enough!!! I'm a traffic cop, and you are an exterminator. When did we lose track of "music teacher"??? I miss those days! Great story!

Mayflower March 7, 2008 at 9:18 AM  

That is so funny! Eddie would be collecting them for her personal bug book. Got any extra? Oh, I feel for you. Your days are never boring!

Yarnhog March 7, 2008 at 10:54 AM  

That is wrong, wrong, wrong. You have to collect bugs on tape and stick them in a bug book? So, what, it's like a book full of squashed, rotting bug carcasses? Who gets the pleasure of storing that little receptacle of death?

Jennifer March 7, 2008 at 3:50 PM  

That's so disgusting, Carol. I would not be able to do it and would be asking other teachers to collect the bugs. As it is, I can barely kill a bug that's about to devour my boys. And if there's a wasp or bee in the house, I just hole us up in one of the bedrooms until my husband gets home to kill it. I don't like bugs.

Lydee March 7, 2008 at 9:22 PM  

Yarnhog, the bug book is stored in the school office. Apparently that's the appropriate place for it, since, according you other teachers, it's not a county wide policy to collect samples. It must only be a policy from my particular administrator. So the bugs can rot in his office, and good riddance.

Haley March 8, 2008 at 8:51 PM  

Hillarious! great story. crazy policy. wonderful post. thanks for sharing and making me smile.

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Hmm, seems somewhat redundant. I'm a mom of 2 lovely ladies. I'm the wife of a triathlete machine. I'm a general music teacher in a public school. I like to take pictures of things, especially things i consider beautiful. I like to share. As long as it isn't food. Enjoy!

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